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Empodera Latina
Empodera Latina

Season 1, Episode · 1 year ago

Is Love Enough with Dr. Charles Corprew

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Ah, l'amour. Such an amazing feeling and beautiful when everything first starts. The sun shining, the birds chirping but once the honeymoon wears off, or you begin to see your person for who they really are, is love enough to keep the relationship going? For this episode I consulted good friend, Dr. Charles Corprew of the What's your Revolution podcast to give me the males perspective on the topic.  We talk about the fundamentals of a relationship, from communication, commitment type, forgiving and so much more. We even confess about our own person relationships, pluses and mistakes. This podcast is dedicate to all my empowerment circle of supporters and patrons who are loyal followers and support this podcast. For more information on becoming part of the goddesses, visit: https://www.patreon.com/Empowermentandallthat --- Send in a voice message: https://anchor.fm/rita-bautista/message

You're listening to empowerment and allthat podcast, your favorite podcast for women's empowerment, hosted byridabautistaff it's time to be reminded of the authority of your inner goddessand elevate the power within. Are you ready? I guys welcome back to another episodeof empowerment and all that your favorite podcast for female empowerment?I'm your host read about Tisa and I'm super excited today, because I'll betalking with one of my good friends doctor Charles Sumner Corprew, thethird, yes Yo, that's his name, wow put it all out there and one of thegood things about this episode. You guys is we're going to be talking about.The topic is love enough now this for those out there who are like, Oh, myGod, where we go relationships again, but truthfully, love in general as awhole can be applied to relationships your into relationships with work, yourfriends, your children and, obviously, most importantly with this topic in partnership. So oneof the cool things about Dactor, Chas cobrew, is that he actually is a HD in psychological signce. Thank youvery much for that, because I know it's going to get it wrong, but he's got some amazing insite andone of the greatest things about having one of your good friends on the show isthat you'll always get some pretty good answer. But you get some really greatcontent because you're just being you'r most honest and if it's one thing thatDr Charles Corprow and I do well is bancer and are very honest with ourindebth conversations that we tend to have. Yes, we are, and you can go aheadand put it out to the world what you actually call me, Charlie, yeah. There we go youwere theonly person in the world that I allow to call me, Charlie, so dam, honored,you're, welcome, Rita and IAM. I am grateful to actually be on the otherside now to be a guest on your show, because you have been like my mostfavorite guest on the wets revolution podcast. So I I am honore to be on theother side of, like N, hopefully give your listeners everything that theywant to hear about is love enough. Funny fact I keep calling you CharlesCorpte Charle, show the first show I was actually ever onwhen it came down to the radio podcast which his show whats. Your Revolutionis now on Itunes, rite on itunes. It's onsound cloud. It Bon Player FM is on wherever you want to find it. It's onIhart Radio Hoever you need to find. What's the revolution is right therefor you, yeah. One of the things I love about the topics of Charles show isthat he goes into mile masculinity and talks about every single thing possibleand what better show for him to come on than you know, empowerment and all thatthe females perspective on all things empowerment. So, thanks again for beingon, I'm really excited to dive into this episode today. Obviously, the meatand potatoes of this topic is, we think love is enough. Is Love enough to create the foundation of a relationshipand keep it going. So that's two questions. Readit is loveenough. You know to be the foundation and then to keep it going. So I thinkmy answer to the first question is that love has to be the foundation. As I sithere in my house, I can look to the right and see a picture of my motherfob. I've had this picture in my house forthe last fifteen years, and I had that picture if my house, my first house inVirginia, so this picture's got to be at least twenty five years aol. They have been married for fifty fouryears Reta and you know that says something and so thefoundation of what they have is love. My father is ninety. Now my mother isseventy. Eight she'll be seventy nine. In twelve days, my father has alteimersteese his care gift. Love is the foundation of their relationship. Butto answer your second question, it can't love. Just is not going to makeyou through fifty four years. It's friendship, it's trust. It's honesty.It is working through the hard times. It is not going to bet mad, it is beingvulnerable, it is being open, it is growing. It is. You know, making surethat you are your champion for your partner. It is to me all of thosethings and my mother, beautiful one of the most beautiful people that I'veever met inside it out is my father's champion even now, and he will tell youevery day that life has not been the...

...same since he met her fifty four yearsago. But here's the thing Rita: it wasn't always it wasn't always peachesand cream right right. Oh they had you know when I was a child, they had, theyhad rocky road right, he wasn't, but it takes growth. It takes that opportunityto see who am I going to be? How im I goin to show up I'M gonna grow. Youknow we talk about this on the show how you going to Brop and be a man in yourrelationship sa you know what baby that hurt. I didn't expect that from you,but that hurt- and this is how I'm feeling and you honor the things thatgo on in your relationship, and I learn that tonight. How can you, even even in even in the demise of relationship, canyou honor the time that you've had together Oknow? I think that is something thatwe don't. We don't honor that time together, people we just break up and,like you know, a piece out, I got nothing to do with you and you want itthat time. I think that's a very beautiful thingthat you just said like. Can you be that person's champion, even at thepoint where, if it does end, are you still going to champion the time thatwe spent with each other right, like that's a pretty big thing to thinkabout, because most of the time when you break up with somebody you'rejust like, if you on't, want to see you again in talk to me, Bla BlahBlahblahblah or which I think is such a more modern approach that I've beennoticing a lot more. If you have children like the whole coparentingthing, I think, is so beautiful right, because just because your relationshipbroke up doesn't mean that Love wasn't there and that that love can't betranslated to your children right right exactly so. I love that. You said that, becauseI am a professional single person right now, really you get paid for this roial exactly what does that pay liketwenty five thirtyars an hour? I don't know I mean we talk about mydog on this show occasionally, but he said so. I got a I gotta get another,do a professional single person. You knowwe and you and I have talk what it feels like and in those perios of time when it getswhen e gets only. I like, I don't want to feel like that right. We tellourselves like this. Is this sucks, but what's the alternative? Sometime right,I don't want to feel like I'm in this toxic toxic relationship with thistoxic person and I'm not happy and all I'm trying to do is get out. So I thinkall we trying to do is found the sweet spot right. That's very true! Now it'sinteresting that you bring up paxic relationships, because the episode thatI was on that I had recently the one prior to this one was actually on toxicrelationships and one of the conversations that we one of thequestions that I had asked her was you know: can you get out of a toxicrelationship and TNAT necessarily like exit to the left out, but like? Can youactually find yourself out of the toxicity and so many people instead ofworking on the relationship which is harder choose to exit left and to me as funnyas this is going to sound and really hard for me to admit it's always easierfor me to exit to the left, because I feel like this person doesn't understand me. Thisperson doesn't Blah Blah Blah we're never going to get there. We're nevergoing to understand each other. But then I'm like, I see relationships thathave been together for like twenty thirety years and they never get eachother and at the basis of that is because, for some reason or other atthe beginning, they fell in love with each other. So profoundly that theywere like you know what every single day I'm gonna choose. You I'm not goingto put this Pillo over your face today, I'm actually going to let you liveanother day because hopefully, today you're going to get it right, yeah! No! I have a good friend. Her name is Christy Lionand her and her husband have been married. You K, O probably close tothirty years and I'm probably putting her business out the streets, but yeahyou didn't have to pusay her whole name, Ih, no right, tagger, yeah, yeah, Accristi Lions, butwhat that was one thing that she says: She's like I choose my husband everyday and she's like I'm, not GOINNA put her business out of the space but she'slike. I know how to make my marriage work every dayand she says we do that every day right he'se, like I understand that I have aman, and I have a man's man right and to honor our marriage, I'm going tomake sure that he knows that I love them every day and he chooses meeveryday, and so we have that ability to love each other she's like it's noteasy after day, it's not easy every day, but we choose to love each other and wechoose to honor our relationship and what we know some of the things thatwere good. So I appreciate I appreciated that, but it also broughtme back this conversation that you know we've had a number of time is: How do you work through the pexisand goes back to whati o theme, because...

...it's like you, said it's easy to exitsdays left. This is a toxic relationship, we didn't say abusiverelationship right. We said toxic and there's a difference between, and I think about my past relationshipthat you and I have talked at length about you- know we'll call her misstenya right, Armen, GCARM, garments, San Diego, wehad a toxic relationship and it didn't start out like that. Well, maybe it didbecause there were, there was outlying. There were out, you know, horses thatwere outside of our our ability to control that created the toxicityanywhay, but we never ever really addressed howto get out of the toxis. It was jus easier to all right peace, Exan, STAC'sleft all right. I Love You, I'm gonna get back in this, I'm gn jump back in,but we didn't do the healthy work around. What does it mean that we'reinto acknowledge that we're on toxic relationship? And then what does itmean? What does it mean and what does it look like for us to be healthy? This is eitherfor it's easy for you say: I'm gonna find somebody else and hite's not thatI don't have to deal with this tactisty, but you you gont. You can carry thattoxicity with you because it doesn't change until you addressed. So I think that's a really good pointright, but I K I'm not a Professiona atist again, I'mprofessional, being single, but I would say that, in order to dothat, someone has to been someone else e someone has to bend and say and notbe afraid of being vulnerable. Instead of being those two kids that are likebiting each other. Have you ever seen that there was like a burning man hadan amazing sculpture, where it's like two adult people that have their backsto each other and the children are on the inside like trying to break theirand touch each other's hands? And it's like, I think, it's like themost amazing sculpture ever because I'm like that's what that's. Essentially,what love is is like people who I tuatly as adults. You have to createthese like ideas of what a relationship is, but the two kids on the insidethose were the ones that fell in love right because you feel all giddy andlike everything's amazing. You feel veryfree and liberated when you're first starting the fall in love and then allof a sudden, the adult things start falling in yeah ioh this, oh, that it'sthe perfect example is like h, the chase mode right when the man like, Oh,my God, he could literally bring the moon down from the from the sky whenhe's chasing you, but when he knows he got to then he's like all right, I'mdead, like I'm good back to Benan adult. That's I bout to ghost s again likewhat just happened. You know. Let me bring you this kickcat. You know you'be Goodat, Thatmygo, Heo, no exection right but yeah. So you know looking at thatthat Fulter I'm always. I always think about that. I'm, like you know when Yoadults are fighting each other. They really are like you know what they sayis like each mind: a different world and Sto. Like you, don't understand theother person Wif one person Wuld to break and stay. Listen, I'm going to bethe vulnerable one and unfortunately for a lot of relationship, women tandto be the ones to break and be vulnerable, and I think we're in a place now wherewomen are getting tired of the overmasculinity and having to be theone to always break and always be like okay Leddy, you know, you've beengetting on my nerves and- and you play this like adult roll, but the kids onthe inside are like you know. I just want to get back to that happy placeagain. Yo. There are a lot of things that comeup right now, theyr bubble up, so the first thing was like Youolt know:man like Tivredit, Dont Yoyou know us like that and thenI'm like. But that's why you do the show charls. So you need to acknowledgethat and so you're right. You are right and say that one more time to thelisteners can hear that you are right. Readi and you know thinking about the situationthat we talked about earlier. You know the events of this pea and you know I'll even talk about I'll.Even talk about the endsf events of this this evening, you know I've beenseeing a woman for a little while, and you know we just kind of clicked. Itwas good. I was work, it felt good, it fell right and you know kind of cut outall the all the other noise that was going on and but we hadn't had those you o. Wehadn't had one of the foundational conversations that needed to have andthen once we had it, it was like were, are we're on two different islands, tworeally really different islands, and so...

...because of that you know, we've got to. We basically have to say you know whathey we got. Ta, we gotto let this go. So Ifelt myself like being like that little boy, like Igottop of this, like I'm Gonto, just buck up like whatever piece I'll, let yourboy later, whenever, whenever you realize like you're, losing somethinggood right. IS THAT EGO? Let me finish the TOR yeah right, but it isn't, butit is ego- and you know the beautiful woman that she is, and you know our time together is just beautiful magical. I mean I could useall of these various adjectives that go along with the time, but she said I hear some things in youand I want to make sure that we honor this time together our long or Hawvershorted his been, and it was like almost like. Oh I'm,gonna keep punching like God, but it was a punch to got like yes, honor thistime be vulnerable to say how you feel about this space that we've been in andthe reality is that, because we have a difference in our core values, we're going to walk away from this, butbut allow yourself to be vulnerable enough to honor the time that we've hadtogether and, like you said, we don't do that. We don't honor that peoplecome into your spate and they're there and to be amicableand to to just say you know what I'm I'mgrateful for this time with you, which is hard because minut, like you, knowwhat allow my I allowed myself to be Fonhem with you. I have feelings foryou, like Youre, not going to work this shit out, I'm saying and then you're like allright, but I think we have to get to that space for this. What I'm sayingand that's what I'm trying to push without brothers, on the show, likefigure, that figure it out go. You know how to be vulnerable enough to be inspace with the people who you love. Think that's such an amazingperspective. I mean I'm like yeah. You know. I love that again, the honor thing: it's really itdoesn't matter if it was a lifetime or two month like being respectful enough,and I love her perspective because that's going to hiunt you forever, whydoes it Helpe to home me Wut see sow many is that is that reader? That's notthat's a no. That sounds like that. Ol potection from Readyn it's going tohaunt you, Charles I'm just kidding, yea, want to get married that that'swhat it is. I don't want to get married. I want to be in a long term, lovingmonogamous relationship, but I don't want to be married, you know, and so, if that's, if that'sa part of our conversation tonight like is love enough, no love is not enough. Simply it's not enough. It is so manythings that have to happen for a relationship to be right. I could love you. I Love You Reda K, Carle love you too, but I think that that's a good pointright, like relationships, do need so much more than just that initialfeeling right, because as much as love is beautiful and the movies make us allfeel as though you know love's just going to carry us through love's goingto get us out of hunger and poverty, and all of this stuffs like no love isthat you still have to work and you still hve to create. If you have to do XC- and it's like that's not enough for onesingle person- then what is enough to carry a relationship through right,because you can have love as the foundation that actually helped created. But then you need the rest of the building blocks, right,that's n, yeah and the and those building boks have to be. The word I want to say is correlative,but I think you know those buildings K, ther, SOM,Roomno, exactly exact, but they have to match that you have to found. You knowsome foundational pieces that actually match as you're building this Motherapist says all the time when you overlay the two of you right, you don'thave to be like, like an perfect match for each other,but you should be at least be a vindigram where there's a lot ofmatching. That's going long between the two things and your question is: What do you need? IsYou need to have similar? I'm not saying that all of your core valuesneed to be the same, but you need to have similar core value and like if you don't eat well, think about yourhealth, like taking care of your body and youthinking about what you're putting in your body to take care of that that's acore value for me and if we don't match on that, then we'e going to we're goingto have problem right because we're...

...going to be fighting over what you'reputting in your body and can I say something really good yeah it.Woe got no go ahead. It's bencher as much as I love what you're saying rightnow. I think one part that you're forgetting is that we cannot control anybody else totally agree on totally agree. No, I'm notjustwait way Charles WaitCarlie before I'm not saying that, but the buildingthe building blocks have to be there. So if that those core values are there,you can continue to build, but without those corves. What I'msaying is that you may try to control that situation when you why you eatingthat cheese, Burger and Frid right? Why don't you eating this impossible?Burger, Younoa Yo, you haven't had an impossibleburger, I'm good bro, I doburgers. I gave up bred meat, tbut yeah man getsyou an impossible burger. Yes, you're missing out on life, I'm good, I'malready missing t out on beef Burgers, so we're good right. So I think that's you know, that's thepiece. What do you? What do you think you know has to be if we're building,if we are building this perfect relationship, Wel we're building therelationship that we want because nothing's perfect what else has to bethere? You know, I think, honestly, a commonground of being able to work through issues not leaving the issue on thetable, but actually working through them together. Apologies and forgiveness are huge because you know what, if I wanted you to bewhat if I want to eat a burger today? What? If I'M TIRED? What? If you don'tknow all the stress I've been under and I just want to eat this burger- and Idon't want to talk to you right now and I know you're going to complain aboutit in like five minutes, but it's like I need to one. Forgive you for tryingto control me for eating is beam, Burger or is regular burger. Buthonestly it really. I think truthfully, because we are all our own independentpeople we're going to make mistakes, and someof us make them every single day and it's all about not being afraid toapologize and not being afraid to forgive somebody and move past that you know it's through from yeah. I wasreading the other days. Psychology today you reall now me you know me. Ilove reading like all of these, like personal developmentsliit's, all thestuff, and it was talking about not about how it's bad to argue. I feel that personally, I'm just likeI'm still overarguing like as soon as I feel like it somethines in blow up onmy ye, I'm done hands up I'm over. I quit I'm not doing the same more as itleft right, but it was talking about like the thecouples that actually argue more now, not abusive, arguing right but likepeople who actually argue more and are able to work through that like the nextday or you know, continue working through their relationships. They getstronger because of their arguing and I'm like who was to live in that tesAsan. He wants to argue with you readin Lord Ecase, I'm right, but no I've read that research as wellrea and so thit's, interesting that you say that, because I don't like comflitand with Miss San Diego, we would have COMPLEC and we would have argument. Butwe also had great makeup argument as well Brown. Chicken Brown did, you say: Brown, chicken, Brown cow,yeah, you're Corny, like you, are the queenof Corn Yeah, but- and I think that was one ofthe great that was one of the big parts about that that we could make up and we.So, if we're thinking about the foundations of relationships, physical capacity with each otherbigause, you know physical attraction and they e yeah and chemistry, noyouknow chemistry. When you kiss, when you kiss that person the first time doyou know like wow, that feeling like like going to a wedding and like okayen? U Goin on, and you know you just walk in thisperson to the car and they and they kiss you and you like. Oh, like damn, yeah yeah, your Sayingho likethemomen of likethatimlike. I think that's, that's a great partright. THAT'S THE SPART! That's the initial! I am a person. I want tofindOutar,...

...but unication yeah tell the story, yeasexactly don't go anywhere! WITOUT, oper, Myoknowi, think, and I think that that is probably someone of my heart op yeah. I got my moment. I'm not perfect.Realy tell US Youl store that well yeah. I have many stories, but you know we'lljust say long. Distance has been something thatI was frequently used to or the last couple of years on off or whatever andlong story short. One of the biggest problems for me is:If I'm not getting adequate communication, it doesn't matter howbusy I am. You know I mean, I think, that's one ofthe things that is very interesting when you, when they're, like oh thechase, you got to look like you're busy. You got to do this. You got to do thatI's like yeah. That's absolutely true! I'm if anybody's busy, I am like, be busiest o busy rightright now, I'm working on the podcast. I just started likeing up podcasters,which is a group to bring like INA podcasters together. I am you know, working my full time,job, which is in medical, tmedical, medical sales, industry and I'm alsohelping out with a political campaign OI'm busy. But the thing is: Is Tho Beto, I'm not even going to talk Toyou rightnow? No, no! I actually would have voted for Bato. I wasn't a resident yetat the state, the grat state of Texas, everything, Uleon Ulion cashwen need tostay in the race to it is hopefully I'm hoping he go yeah. You know I meanobviously he's not the front. Runner won't be the front runner, but I thinkthis guy emn following his career for so manyyears. I really I grow to be some really amazing politician for the restof his life. So I really anyway back to communicationcommunities, love enough in collegic nokay. Oh it's enough in politic, you girl from Californiait's enough, Oh boy, it's all right! It's a lot! But lt you talking aboutcommunication and yeah your long distant relationship, yeah, and youknow it was always a big deal. It's like if you're, not communicating Ye, Imean, and everybody has a different communications, tyle right, some people,like the text message all day long. Some people just need a five minute.Checken, it's not even a fold. Diveinto a phone call or you know, give me yourlife story. I just want to fall in love on the phone. Sometimes it's like. I don't want to talk to you, but I'mcalling you because you you matter you matter and the thing is, is you know? Theother thing is compromising right like that is a very, very important part ofrelationship. Is We do have our core values? We do have our fundamentals,but are you willing to compromise with the person that you're in union with if this person wants you to get married,and you don't want to get married because that's a core value of yours,you're sticking to that right, yeah and- and she does it's like- was this the time to have theconversation yet and that's also something that I'm learning to is like? When do you have the complicatedconversations, and when do you hold back from the complicated conversationontinue to flow with it and see what happens? Because maybe if time would have naturally justallowed itself to show you guys you weren't compatible, you would havecontinued to have a great time with each other, so you lost me there, because one I'Lgo I'll go back toanswer this question one. I think you have the foundation ofquestions early when you're when you're my age right. Maybe not you know youryouthful Wuente Te Tan, my age of whatever it im, stop telling people myage. I realize that you don't have to you look erful! Thank you. Thank youWAII way to pull that back. I like, but I think you have those foundationalconversation if you're looking to settle down and be you know in whateveryou define, is a relationship. You know you have those foundations. Do you wantto have children? Do you want to get married? Where do you want to live, howyou know those types of things, but the otherthing that I say- and I love that you talk about Communication Rida- is thatI read this book maybe fifteen years ago, but one of thethings it talks about is that you vomit in moderation and so it's an interesting conceptbecause sometimes well get in relationships in his new and then we'relike Blah. Let me tell you everything about my life, all my perils, all thegood ti everything right and then all of a sudden you like, where did wheredid hear she go because you have onmated everythingabout your life, think about that think about that wworst first date and theguys just like or the woman is just...

...like everything you like. I can't getout of this date fast enough. You know I can tols you exit less retegy. Yes, yes,but that was one of the things that she and I work through. Is that we're goingto vomit a moderation and so we' established this level of conversationlike okay, are Wou Ready? Are we ready to have this level of conversation, soyou broach it in that manner like? Are we ready, because I'm about to about todrop somethings about me that I don't I may or may not know if you're ready tohandle and so communication is cuge, but I push it to people as you'regetting to know someone in your building relationship, bombin tomoderation, now see where your relationship is before you talk aboutpast histories, Hof, past past histories of trauma or different things,that person may not be ready or equip, or something like that and allow themsee where they are, because, if they're not ready to handle your trauma orhandle your life toor, then maybe that's not your person. Watyou know. If people know peopleunderstand this is we're also videoing this. So I can see reades facialexpressions. You have that you HAV that loving, look in your face right, ValeryYeah. No, I don't. If anybody knows read it in Charle,when they get on a podcast or a radio show, it is nad jokes with the Cah thewhole time. I always get that. I think your producer told me one tie CECK ormessage she was like. I was just listening to the show and I wascracking out the entire dimewas like yeah. I keep telling Charlie that wemeed a podcast together. Okay, I'M NOT gonna. Tell you what she said the firsttime you on the show, it's fine, we don'tomit Moderaton. I just want yeah. I don't Wanto tellthat story. I was BA. Let me tell it Aoyou know: that's they like being a person whos becoming so muchmore selfaware. I know that that is something that I do.Naturally, I talk about everything the everyone, because in some sense of myself I trulybelieve that people have everyone's best interests in mindlike we all have each other's best interests at heart, and so I'm likewewl. If I'm the one who puts myself out there. First then, other peoplefeel more comfortable talking about their insecurities and theirvonabilities, because I'm not afraid to do that and believe it or not aboutseventy five percent of the time that actually work, because once they see that I'm notafraid of my vunerabilities and theire opens to speak about theirs. It's weird,but in turn right like I do agree with whatyou're saying I mean it's better to just like, let it out slowly then, tojust vomit all over them. Let it out slowly, reade, you know letit out slowly, you are the most amazing Latino podcaster thatiave ever met yeah. I think I'm, the only one he'sever met yeah, probably so, but yeah yeah, yeah Ol good, oh good. What whatelse I mean as W as we think about this? What would you want it's funny when youget to Tto host on one show? You know what's that other Charles Nowhat' TinIV Inerviewe you on your shosometimes hat, I know that's! That's H, t how wedo we're good, like that. Yeah Yeah is love enough and we said no, we talkeabout communication. You know honesty, you know talking about thosefoundational blocks, not Bominin O moderation. What else?What's going to make this work, what we said compromise as well right,oh that's right! I forgot compromise and I think it's also the ability to stay beu going to stay when that person ishaving a weeko themselves and being pissed off. Are you going to stay whenthat person is you know, having a hard week? Are yougoing to stay when they hit a nerve? Are you going to staywhen they said something that you know? Is Your soft spot and you don't likepeople to say or talk about? Are you going to stay when things are great? Are you going to stay when you'rescared that they're getting too close yeah? He tell your story. Rita. Yeah metell the story. Tell Thet! I'm sorry tell the story El. You know. I think the thing is soin general, I've been the kind of person that I'm open to giving peoplesecond chances bthat. They actually...

...seem as though they it looks like it's progressing into asecond chance right are the queen of secondanse. Okay. I believe in people Idon't know why, and I know it's terrible and I'm probably learningthrough this. My my therapist, probably listening to me right now be like stopit now bar, but your think right. There are chances when people makemistakes and they they learn. They grow and things change with time. They'renot going to change a hundred percent fundamentally right, but people dolearn through their mistake, and I know I've made a lot of mistake so giving somebody second opportunities,not beyond me. If I know that our corevalues actually are the same, ruin imean. I agree. Forgivethis, you know, forgiveness is a part of life and can you bring yourself? Iforgive everybody man, I don't and that's that's truly one of myfundamentals to like I do forgive people, because we are human, becausewe do make mistake, my shuld. I make mistakes all the timeI cut the cord too soon sometime. You know I mean like this. This issomething that ive noticed and truthfully in this last talkingship. I don't even know what the hell to callit situationship, that's what we tal. I hate that atoretionship. You knowYeahas me like what is t e situationship. It's not a relationship.Is that you're not he's? Not your boyfriend yeah, you know match yourboyfriend. Aat Is he's not your boyfriend boy, Wn,even call you his girlfriend asa yeah. Thank you. What's that do's name, notmy boyfriend, try harder is what his name. No. You know and I think that it liesin expectation right. Nd, I think expectation is the martyr of lettingpeople down right m say that again expectation is themartyr it's the MARDEROF, letting people down, because when Ou head, I'msorry Oso Boloy. No, I can't hear okay yeah, Oh yeah, so expectation I feel like is you know when you have expectations, otsomebody and we're not supposed to right, but naturally, when you start tofeel emotions for somebody or you start to see them in a different life thanyou were seeing them before, because you're letting them in YEU start togrow these random expectations for people hen. They don't meet thembecause nobody ever will youget mad and you you know you just give that and Sayeah I meanyou're right expectation. I love that I got to use that expectations of are themartyr of. I can't remember what I just Sai. Wegot to reward that back. ICANT, wait to hear that o the Mar I mean yeah. It'samazing likeets, also the marter of happiness too, but yeah and and soyou're right, because once you begin to there's a lot of research on likecouples, rhythms like how they sink up- and you know you coan- manipulate this right, butyou get into a rhythm together and the calls the visit how you going to justyou know how you' going to maneuver together and what happens is that when those changeYo, because you've created expectations, it's five pm right Chald is going tocall me a five pm every day right and when so six o'clock comes on a Thursday.You, like Yo wher, you been for the last hour because you've set that sinkyou've set that ex you've set that expectation and expectations can be really good. So I'msetting the excepectation of this is what I expect, but we also have toallow for some fluidity in those expectations as well, because stuffdoes happen right. My phone Di Yeah men accidentally forget theirphones, froly yeah. I get that you know hworld whereeveryone is connected to their cell phone like it's their hands right, myphonda anymore, yeah right, but now what I'm saying like something came up.It doesn't mean so when you get a text later on in the later on or hey heylove, I'm sorry, so the expectation should also be hey. Love, I'm sorry,Ind! No supposed to you know: We've been talking every day at five.Something came up. I just want to let you know everything is good alcoholsnow, so there's also that level of expectation can you communicate and youcommunicate yes and it's. I think it's also wrapped up in some parts, Heirespect as well. No M re! If you start building that you say it was thinkingSan Yeah, it's a level of how. How are you goingto continue the level of respect for that person to? Let them know? Hey Look,you know what I'm kind of busy or I'm a little tired of a headache. I don'treally want to talk today: okay, well...

...right, yeah and an and justcommunicating that- and we get you know we get caught up, sometimes ndor sometimes you ou got to have. Sometimes you got to just pick up thephone and call right, even if it's two minutes like you said, because I havelost relationships because we can't infer tone right: Hey, Rida, Havehey Rida, how are youquestionmark peace? We just like? What's o Whith Charlee, you feeling bad?You can't, because that's not how we usually talk to each other, but youhave inferred my tongue, I cunlik, Hey Reda, we never ca. We never can infertol. Doyou know, there's an AP coming out now that tries to infer tone based on techand allows you to deciphe your tone before you send the text that is awful.Can we just say y have gotten so far away from hearing each other's voiceslike it's unacceptable. I don't get it like. There's some things about beingold fashiones like I love a good old fashon phone call like ask right. Icall you right, like I'm, not saying right whatever, but like I like tolisten to the person I'm talking to and that's Ju, that fos with everybody likemy friends, my good friend one of my good friends, hector I'll call him.I've been calling him Sie Asi was nineteen at his job at work. When he'sworking and he's like Hey, I'm working, I was like theyyou're, not hey look, soI have to talk to you about something he's like fine. Let me go close my door. I met this Guy Name Charle. It'sCharlie always answers the phone like, but it's true though, like with myfriends, you know I've Gotento this porm in, like I etect messages like I,I do it because that's what we have to communicate these days with everybody,because everyone's en that instant gratification right yeah, I don't want to see, I want T- Iwant to see dot that dot like quickly. Well, we use that that dod on men,because we like to play with the OL's minds it I'm kidding, love- is enough. You Rclearly iis, not enough when you in a Apple World Te, look just look justtyping still typing you're like day. What book is She Bo exactly and thenall of a sudden, you get hey reallyall that these duts been Lhese.Das Been Rolling for thirty minutes, Hey trashy, you know that's after yoall disappearedor something happened. They want to tell you they want to tell you off andthen they're like Yo know what let me not. Let me not write a book. Let mejust explain: Hey Period: okay period, Hey, look you want to talkabout is love enough. What you need to do in communication? Don't haveconversations about your relationship over tech, like that's yeah people willwrite a book about how they're feelings and Thot pick up the phone like. Areyou kidding me now? I got to infer all of this like where you wil, like I loveyou or I hate you or all o these things about the relationship. I got to inferthat you are saying this in a loving tone or no because most of the times wego to the negative right. We like. Oh you, crazy, crazy, bleap bleep. Youknow I'm saying and no pick up the phone have a is my tex breakup teyre, not good enough. No, I know could, depending on thebreako in respectful. If there is so that's a good question, I want to ask:Can you break up with someone over Atech Man? I Love I love being on the showwith you, God we could make millions of dollars together. We could Ese. Let'sstart now. If you want to sponsor us, just drop a line exactly exactly, butyou know I think, looking back at recent situation, it could be disrespectful to do thatright period period. It could be just soing O dothat period, iledisrespectful COMEA period period, yeah, you know, I thinkyou have a point and you know for me and an this is broth. As my as aperson right, I know, one of my biggest problems because of anxiety is patiente,is having the patience to wait until the first INS available to talk aboutwhat I'm feeling right and ywant to talk about right now. Yeah but IV got better o right,definitely gote a lot better at the approach of the sex messages, but youknow I definitely had have some girth to do and yeah I can. I can admit, whenI've made mistakes and yeah, I have in...

...the past, made mistakes Wer I've endedrelationships or gating people overtext messages which I think is the biggest you'e looking back at it, the biggestFu that you could give somebody, because it's like you're, not evenGonno, give me the ability to talk to you about this. So you wrote you rolled out basicallywhat you'e saying, because you weren't patient enough to wait for theconversation, Oh yeah, but I think it was also a very unique situation right.It was very textbase communication and although the conversations were thereoccasionally, it was like once a month or whatever. I wanted it more frequently that wasn'tsomething that that person could provide because of their their situation or whatever so so. Love is, love is not enough andpatience is a part of the part of the you know by by you're right, Charles No, you know Iagree, you know, I think everybody makes mistake, no one's perfect, and sothat's what I'm saying like the power of forgiveness is also really extremelyimportant. When it comes TASTPLA BEDAES one thing doesn't: Ot weigh the otherright like one one thing yeah when you make fakes, one thing isn'k Ang, a Outwei, the other you're, still both the AL still making stake,but it you have the power to forgive theperson. You have the ability to hear them and say you know what this was stupid. You should not havedone that. Not Do this again and you know if the foundation is thereyeah, you have love and, and you love the person genuinely, and you can putthis ridiculousness aside and say I know you made a mistake: You're notgoing to do it again, and this is how we move forward Rightlor let's see how we can move folward from here, and you start rebuildingruin. I mean that's true and forgive this isheart and forgiveness is tough for men we are man, stubborn Stubburn, Stub, Arni'm,Atar, I'm Atars, but I've had tim sombody, Terris Yeah. I've had to learnto forgive and that's been huge part of my growth to be able to begive, toforgive myself and to forgive others who have agreed against me. Yeah waithow you said your parents have been together four fifty seven years, fiftyfour. How many times do you think each one ofthem forgave each other man? Look if look look at my mother, she's, like Igotta, forgive his ass every day. So that's fifty four times threehundred and sixty five Yel, that's Alit's, interesting right, like I'm,not a religious person, I don't believe anything, but I do respect it an Irespect the importance of it people and I think, one of the things I alwaysremember, there's a saying biblical saying is, like you have to forgivepeople sevent with I siten, that is to sate so seventy time, seven M S andthat that stuck with me, as my grandmoth used to tell me that all thetime, because I had a very interesting relationship with my father growing up-and it was always like me trying to forgiveit me trying, but then I justwould I would just shut down and block Hem out right and so now, right after she passed away,I tri to live with that, like you have to forgive people, because if you makemistakes every single day, every single day we make mistakes, westand against ourselves every single day. Yeah well makes you think thatthat person isn't sending against himselves and against you and it's notpurpose col. You know it wasn't done on purpose. They just had other thingsthey needd to do right, no yeah. I totally. I totally agree with you that you have to learn how to forgeve. Yougot to figure that out and that forgiveness is one of the hardestthings that we can do in life right. I got to forgive you and Poh. It's easy to hold that it's easyto hold. All of that in. Like I hate you ha, you did this to me, but one ofthe things we talke about account back ventures where I am the director of theEducation Fellowship where we, you know where we basically believe in women, anAchmonner's pollor and we fund them as early stage ventures. Is that we talkabout a hundred percent responsibility like yeah, you agreeg against me, but Istill have a hundred percent responsibility and how I react to that and so oftentimes we loved it. We loveto hold a blace easy W. it's easy! Rida! It's easy! I can blame all of that onyou. I take no responsibility Yep if I'm mad about it. If I'm angry aboutit as a responsibility, because I don't have to be that can be, you know- youbroke my heart reader and so I've been...

...mad at you for eight eighteenthousandyears. But now I take responsibility. Hu think about that too. Right, likeit's being angry with somebody not forgiving them is like drinking poisonand hoping they die. Reaty Readi, who are you modern, Daceo, see that you justdropping these pearls drinking poson and hopind Kay di Wow? That's theweight of anger me way of not forgiving. Somebody is like well, I hope you die now because yeah Idrank this place and of the anger just and it just you know how anger is it'slike. It starts right here, an start poing up, and so you stet right andyou're like okay, but yeah. So would you drink the poison and let theother person Die Charlie. I think at this Taye O my life. No, Iwouldn't drink the portion because the person its not going to die theperson who's dying inside is you right, and so I haven't learn had to learn. Toforgive I mean like porgive like to be in space and to be collegial to peoplewho ever I mean seriously agrees to get me against me and just to be like allright, but Lok Charles. I want to thank you so much for joining me today onempowerment and all that this has been such an awesome episode. I always havea great time when we're on the Mike Together, but if anybody wants tolisten to what's your revolution, show I'm going no actually put all theinformation in the show notes, so you can reach Dr Charles Corpro. Ask Himsome more questions about whether or not love is enough and listen to hispodcast. What's your revolution? Yeah, no doubt Mane, so you check it outeverywhere. You can resech the time. Reada, Rida, always love being with youin that smile, and you know, love being one of one of your good friendsappreciate that title well to the next time. You guys make sure to keep itpositive or don't keep it at all. Thanks for tuning into empowerment andall that podcast with your host Ry Abou Tista want to help me grow the listenertribe, make sure to subscribe to this podcast and follow us on instagram andfacebook under empowerment, and all that and remember, keep it positive ordon't keep it at all.

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